Hard Lessons in Life: or, how it’s supposed to be about having fun and not about winning or losing, but winning is much more fun….

This weekend we had the Friendship Tournament in Kona. An AYSO Soccer tournament for teams from around the island (Kona, North Hawaii, Hilo, & Puna).

We took Sydney’s soccer team, the Wildfires to the tournament. This year’s team has been a great bunch of girls, all very evenly skilled, all with great attitudes and with a great team spirit. We had high hopes of doing good in the tournament, and we did.

First game, Saturday morning we won against a Kona team 3-2.
Second game, Saturday afternoon we won against a Puna team 6-2, kids were playing incredibly well.

Saturday the girls that were staying at the same condo we we were (5 of the players in total) had a sleep over at one of the girls condo. They had a blast and really bonded as friends...
Sunday morning we found out that we had already made it into the championship game regardless of how we did on our morning game, still, the girls played hard and tied 1-1 against another Kona team. Hana hanging out with little Maya...
The final was set for 2PM against another Kona team. Girls in both teams were tired, but excited. We went ahead on the first quarter 1-0, but the Kona team quickly scored and tied the game 1-1. Second quarter we went ahead again 2-1 and Kona tied it again 2-2. No scores on the third quarter, although we had one shot hit the post….Fourth quarter another shot from our team hit the post, and with about 5 minutes left in the game the Kona girls scored to turn the game around for the final score of 3-2.
We got second place, which is very good, but the girls were devastated, they had worked hard all season and all weekend for this game, and they had the victory within their grasp. That is what made it harder for them. When you lose by a big margin, you know there was no chance to win the game, but when you get ahead in the scoreboard twice in the game, and the other team pulls the game from under you, it hurts….I’ve been there, it is not fun. They had every right to be frustrated and sad. Truth is that the Kona girls played a very good game too, and it could've gone either way....
I tried telling the girls how proud I was of them and what a great job they had done all season and weekend long, and that unfortunately in soccer, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes even when you play better than the other team you still lose, call it luck….
Truth is when you are in a competition, you play to win, not just for fun. It is important to have fun no question about it, and if you are so concerned about winning that you forget to have fun you are doing something wrong, but it is much more fun when win….
As a coach there will be some questions pondering in my head for the days to come, did I play the right lineup? Was there something else I could’ve done or told the girls? Should I have gone all defensive when we were up 2-1?
All in all, I think the girls will look back at this and remember it as being a great experience. I feel that they came back being better friends than when they left, they did have a lot of fun and while unpleasant, it was a life-lesson that should leave them a long lasting impression.
So it was not all soccer, they are kids after all. So in between games they would go and swim in the community pool and have a blast there. Belly Flop! that's going to hurt....
All in all, it was lots of fun!